Mum tapes food to stop 'fat bastard' husband eating it
A Mum decided to literally duct tape all the snacks in the house to prevent her husband from eating them because, in her words, he’s a ‘fat bastard.’ Oh yeah, she also scattered mousetraps inside the cupboards to stop him rummaging around for biscuits.
Tammy Johnson, from Stockport, said her husband Thomas was constantly snacking so when her brother popped over with some electrical tape, she had the bright idea to tape up all the snacks to prevent her bloke from getting his hands on it. What a lovely woman. Here’s what Tammy said:
My husband had gone up to bed before. We'd been taking the mickey out of my husband because he basically just eats anything in his sight. If the kids leave something on the side, without even thinking about it, he will eat it without even knowing that he has done it.
I put a note in the fridge once but I don't think you'd want to write what was said on it. It said, 'keep out you fat bastard'. We had this little mousetrap, so we decided to put some cakes on the mousetrap and some chocolate leading up to it. Obviously because we'd had a drink we thought it was funny. It was only in the morning that we woke up and were like, 'oh my god, what have we done? Everything in the house is taped up'.
We did what we could do with as much tape as we had. We ran out of tape and my brother was a bit upset in the morning. We ran out of all his electrical tape so he had to go and get more.
Alas, even a whole roll of tape wasn’t enough to keep Thomas away from the snack cupboard. Here’s what he had to say:
It is funny. I understand why she did it, because every time I go in the kitchen I'm always picking food out of the cupboards. She says I never come out of there without food in my mouth. She taped up literally everything, near enough.
She thinks I'm too lazy to undo it but I'm not. I thought she was off her head. I couldn't believe she had done that. She spent an hour doing it, I reckon. We buy bits for the kids but she tells me I eat it. Maybe it's her cooking, that's what it is. I'd rather eat snack food.
I mean that would be pretty annoying to but food for your kids lunchboxes and your greedy fat husband scoffs the lot. Maybe she needs to start padlocking everything.
